Saturday, 26 January 2013

Recently my bottom has been getting me into trouble. Not proper trouble, where I get put in "time out" because the parent staff are feeling cruel, but the kind of trouble where grown-ups shriek and put on stern faces and pretend to have cross voices, but really they are laughing.

A few days ago, while I was playing with my toys in the living room and mummy was talking on the sofa with our friend Jess (who had come round to visit us), my bottom let out an enormous burp ... and because I always get told off for making bottom burps, I immediately spun around, pointed straight at mummy and shouted, "MUM-MEEEEEY!!!!!"

Mummy and Jess both looked very shocked, but they were also laughing A LOT. Mummy had to check that Jess knew that the bottom burp wasn't hers, and then she made me say "Pardon me"; which I did with a big wide grin on my face.

Since that day, mummy has told the bottom burp story to a lot of people. I think that this is because she is worried that I will do it again, and that other people will think that the bottom burps are her fault, and will make her say "Pardon me".

My bottom got me into trouble again today when I was playing with my toys in the hallway. Some of my favourite toys at the moment are a set of little fairy people, who have smiley faces and nice colourful clothes on. I like to put all of the people into my car and take them for rides up and down the hallway, and then to unload them and arrange them in nice neat lines on the floor. (The lines have to be neat. If they are not neat then it makes me upset.)

While I am loading all of the people into my car I will talk to them, like the parent staff do to me. I say, "Tum on then, Georgia Murphy ... put body in car!"

The parent staff laugh about this and say that I should say "everybody", and not just "body", because otherwise the "pul-eese" will come for me. But "body" is easier to say, and besides, I do not know who the "pul-eese" are.

So today, I was putting my little people into the car, and mummy realised that I had done a stinky poo. (It must have been the smell from my nappy that gave me away - hmph.) So mummy reached out to pick me up, and said: "Come on, let's go and change your nappy" ... but I wasn't done with my people and my car, so I shouted "NO!", and at the same time I bottom burped at mummy's hands as I ran away.

Mummy caught me not long after this, and she told me off and made me say another "pardon me" for the bottom burp. And she changed my nappy after all, so my car and my people had to sit and wait until I was clean again.

When the staff were getting me ready for the bath at bedtime, I was running around with no nappy on, and suddenly a little wee escaped from my bottom and splashed onto the floor. I looked up at mummy in great surprise and said, "Water!!"

The grownups laughed and laughed at this, and then mummy had to clean the carpet.

Mummy says that one day I will not have a nappy any more, and I will have to do all of my wees and poos into the toilet, like grown-ups do. This sounds like a bit of a pain, but thankfully mummy didn't say anything about having to do all of my bottom burps in the toilet as well. I can still do those wherever I like.

Wednesday, 23 January 2013

The snow is still with us today, but it is very sneaky. Sometimes it hides away and is almost all gone, and then at other times it sneaks back and makes the ground all white and slippery again.

It also hides in other places, away from our house, and waits for me to come and find it. Today I found it hiding in the garden at Anna and Aoibheann's house. 

At the start of today, mummy was in charge of entertaining me as daddy was finishing night time work. Then daddy came home and mummy went out to work instead. 

Daddy was well behaved today, and he did not try to fall asleep on the floor like he did the other week when he was looking after me. This meant that I did not have to tell him off, and we had a nice time playing instead.

After me and daddy had played and had lunch and done some drawing, daddy put me in my cot for my nap and went off to have a nap of his own. 

I was woken up from nap time by mummy, who was obviously back from work and wanted me to play with her. She got me up and dressed and we went out in the car to Anna and Aoibheann's house.

It was great fun at Anna and Aoibheann's. Two of my friends were there: Aoibheann and Liam. There was also Liam's new baby brother, Rory, but he was not that much fun because he is very small and quiet, and he spends a lot of time sleeping at the moment.

There is always good food at Anna and Aoibheann's. Today Anna gave us lots of pieces of toast and fruit to eat. I made sure that I had at least one piece of toast in my hand all of the time that we were there.  

After we had played inside for a while, the mummies took us all outside to play ... and this is when I realised that most of the snow has been hiding in Aoibheann's garden! There was way more snow here than there is near our house. There was so much that Anna and Aoibheann had already made a snowman, and he was standing in the garden waiting for us when we came outside.

I thought that it was a bit mean of Aoibheann to have been keeping all the snow to herself, but at least she was sharing it now. We made a new snowman, and he had a big lumpy head and a stumpy body and no hair, but he was still very beautiful. I felt very proud of him.

When we had finished our beautiful snowman, we all picked up lumps of snow and ran around throwing them at each other's feet and shouting "Snowball!" This was fun and I got some good shots in at mummy's wellies.

After we were done visiting the snow, mummy took me back home and we decided to jump on daddy, who was still napping after all of this time.

Daddy was very pleased to see us and he came downstairs to talk to me while I ate my dinner and tidied my toys away.

Mummy told me at bedtime that both parent staff will be with me tomorrow, and that we are going to have an adventure and go exploring. I am looking forward to this. I hope that we explore to somewhere where more of the snow is hiding.

Friday, 18 January 2013

Today has been a very important day. It has been the first day that I have seen real snow.

Before today, the staff have shown me snow in my books or on TV, and it has looked interesting ... but I have never had snow at my house until today.

When the parent staff got me up this morning, they were very giddy like they were on "Cris-mus" morning, and they carried me over to the window to show me the ground outside. It was very white everywhere, and there was even more white falling out of the sky.

We had a look at the snow in our yard when we got downstairs. It was very funny and soft, but when I touched it I found that it was not as nice as it looked; it made my hand all tingly and cold, and it didn't want to stay in my fingers for very long. After a little while it turned into cold water and ran away onto the ground.

The parent staff thought that it would be fun to take my toy pram for a walk to the park in the snow, so they got me all dressed up in my wellybobs and lots of other warm things like my hat and scarf and mittens. But when we started to walk along the road we found that it was really slippery, and mummy had to walk behind me bent over all the way, because she was scared that I would fall and hurt myself.

It was very funny watching mummy walk like this: she looked like me when I am doing my goblin walk.

Because it was taking us so long to walk down the road, and I was getting very cold, the parent staff decided that we would go to the shop instead of the park. In the shop we bought some stuff for lunch, and then we walked back home again.

The snow carried on falling out of the sky for the rest of the day, but mummy said that there was still not enough for us to make a snowman. This was a shame, but at least I didn't have to make my hands cold again.

Instead of building a snowman, we did lots of indoor playing, like having tea parties and baking. Me and mummy made some biscuits by scrunching up some sloppy goo in a big bowl and then rolling it out with mummy's rolling pin. Then we pressed my special biscuit cutter into the goo and made cool shapes like stars and hearts and little men, and put them all on a tray to go in the oven.

While we were making the biscuits I kept asking mummy if I could have some. I said, "Peese have biscuits?" many times; but even though I asked really nicely and said please lots, mummy wouldn't let me have any until they had been in the oven.

This was really mean of mummy, because not only did I have to wait aaaaages for the biscuits to be ready, but when mummy finally got them out of the oven, she found that she had left them in for too long and now they had gone all hard and burnt.

If mummy had just let me eat the biscuits when I had asked for them, this wouldn't have happened.

The biscuits did not taste as nice as they should have done, but we ate some of them anyway, because they were still biscuits.

After our baking, we played games in the living room and the parent staff were very silly. They have a game where one person has to put a special hat on their head, and then the other person has to throw soft, squishy  balls at the hat and get them to stick there. Mummy and daddy took it in turns to put the hat on, and then they put it on me and threw balls at my head. This was very funny but also a bit confusing, because when I throw things at people's heads I normally get told off. Typical parent staff, with their silly rules which don't make any sense.

While we were playing the silly games, mummy asked daddy to pass something to her, and she called him "hunny". This was very silly of her because "hunny" is not daddy's name - "hunny" is a funny food that bears like to eat. So I started to laugh and laugh, and I kept saying, "hunny daddy!", and then laughing even more. I laughed so much that the parent staff started laughing too, but they didn't really seem to understand why it was so funny. Mummy is such a silly billy sometimes.

At bedtime, the parent staff told me that they felt bad because I haven't played outside much today. I don't feel bad about this; I have had a fun day even though the snow wouldn't let us get out much ... but the parent staff don't need to know this. It will not do them any harm to feel guilty for a little while, and spoil me a bit more than usual tomorrow.

Thursday, 10 January 2013

I have had a whole day with mummy today, and we have been very busy.

This morning we went to an exciting place that we have not been to before. There were lots of other mummies and babies at the place, and a lady with a box that made music. The lady made music come out of the box, and all of the mummies and babies had to dance and sing and do silly things with their hands and feet.

Then the music lady got out an even bigger box that was full of "in-stroo-ments", and all of the babies chose an "in-stroo-ment" and used it to make lovely music. I chose a beautiful big drum and I made great music by walloping it with a stick.

After all of the music had finished, some of the mummies brought out plates of biscuits for the babies to eat. I got very excited about this because I do not get to eat biscuits often (because of mummy's meanness), and when I had eaten my own biscuit, I also ate some bits of other babies' biscuits that they had dropped on the floor.

I soon realised that mummy was not very happy about me doing this, so whenever I found a piece of floor biscuit I would check that mummy was too far away to stop me from eating it, and then I would shout "Mummy!! Biscuit!!!", and shove it in my mouth before mummy could get to me.

I found that this made the biscuits taste even better.

After our music group, me and mummy went to the park so that I could feed the ducks and give my toys some fresh air. I took my new pram that I got for "Cris-mas", and I put some of my dolls and teddies in it so that I could take them for a walk with us. It is very strange, but whenever I go out walking with mummy normally, I find that I am far too tired to walk more than a few steps, and I have to wail and cling to mummy's knees until she picks me up and carries me. When I have my pram to push, however, I find that I can walk much, much further, and I don't need carrying at all.

It is a very strange thing indeed.

When we got back from the park we had lunch and then nap time, and when I woke up I found that my friend Eve was here to play, and she had brought her mummy Susie with her as well. I had lots of fun playing with Eve, and it was good to show her all of my new toys and my super-cool tent.

Mummy said that we had to stop playing after a while because it was time for our swimming lesson, so then we all got dressed into our swimming things and drove to the swimming pool.

I have not been swimming for a long time because of "Cris-mas", so I was very excited. I really wanted to go off and have a swim on my own, so when we got into the water I kicked my legs lots and shouted "Swim!! Swim!!" ... but for some reason mummy insisted on holding onto me so that I couldn't swim away from her. Mummy said that this was because if she didn't hold onto me, I would "drown", but I think that really she was just trying to spoil my fun.

It was time for tea and bath when we got home from swimming, and I was feeling very sleepy. My busy day has been tiring ... it is hard work looking after mummy all on my own.

Wednesday, 9 January 2013

I spent this morning with the grandparent staff. We went to the big shop to buy food, and I persuaded Nanmar to let me get down from the trolley so that I could run about and look in all the big mirrors to check that I am still as pretty as I remember being. (I am).

Then we went back home and had lunch, and soon after this mummy came home to be my staff for the rest of the day.

In the afternoon we went to Anna and Aoibheann's house to play, and I checked out all of Aiobheann's new toys from Santa, and made a pretty picture using sparkly shapes and feathers.

When me and mummy got home from our playing, daddy was there waiting for us. He helped me to eat my dinner, and then I invited him into my tent to have a tea party while mummy went upstairs to run my bath.

I normally like baths, but at the moment I like tea parties even more ... so when mummy called down to tell us that it was bath time I found myself having a bit of a brawl with her.

I paddied and shouted while daddy carried me upstairs, and then I continued to paddy while mummy lifted me into the bath.

I was feeling very sorry for myself and I felt that mummy should give me a cuddle to make me feel better, so I started scrabbling around in the bubbles and trying to put my soapy hands on mummy's arms. I was wailing very loudly and shouting "Tuddle!" over and over again.

Mummy got very cross with me ... she started telling me off in a very loud voice, so that I could hear her over my wails. She said that she was not going to give me a cuddle while I was being so naughty, and she asked me if I thought that I should be allowed a cuddle while I was behaving like this.

So I took a deep breath, open my mouth wide, and bellowed, "YEE-EESS!!!"

At this point, daddy had to do that thing where he runs out of the room and hides his face because he doesn't want me to see how much he is laughing. Mummy put her serious face on and did not laugh while she finished bathing me, but she did not tell me off again, and I thought that it might be best to stop wailing and put an end to the brawl.

I was friends with the parent staff again by bedtime, and I had a nice cuddle with mummy while I drank my milk. This was nicer and much more quiet than having a brawl, so I felt peaceful and ready for sleep by the time the parent staff put me into bed.

Saturday, 5 January 2013

Today has been mummy's birthday. This means that we have had to spend the whole day pretending that mummy is more important than me.

It has been a challenge.

This morning daddy got me up so that mummy could stay in bed and be lazy. But once I had eaten my breakfast, we came back upstairs to jump on mummy and throw cards at her.

Mummy took the cards out of their envelopes and read them all, and told me who each one was from. I wasn't very interested in knowing who the cards were from. I actually thought that it would be more fun to eat them; but the grown-ups would not let me do this.

Auntie Al was staying in our house too, and she came into the parent staff's room to help us jump on mummy and give her presents to open. Mummy let me help her open the presents, which was fun.

After present time, daddy got me dressed into my party dress and we all went out for lunch. All three grandparent staff were there at the lunch place, and so were Uncle Ben and some of our friends. Mummy got lots more presents to open and I ran around looking for sofas to climb on. Then I got Nanmar and invited her to come and have a special lunch party with me in my sofa den, which I felt would be much cooler than hanging out at the grown-ups' party.

For lunch the grown-ups all had pizza but mummy got me a salad, which I thought was mean. So I picked all the chicken and cheese out of my salad, ignored the green bits, and ate some pieces of pizza that Nanmar sneaked over to me when mummy wasn't looking. Heh heh.

When we had all eaten our lunch the parent staff took me home and put me in my cot to nap. I had a nice long nap and then got up to play. There were lots of grown-ups around to play with and I was very kind, making tea for them all and bringing them books to read me.

After dinner time, the parent staff took me upstairs for my bath, and while I was in the bath daddy asked me to say happy birthday to mummy, and to tell her that I love her. I said, "Happy birthday to you, mummy piggy!", and then I said, "I you!", which is what I tell grown-ups when they say that they love me (which happens often).

The parent staff said, "Aww!" and gave me lots of smiles and kisses. So then I said, "I you, daddy!", and they said, "Aww!" again, and gave me more smiles.

Then I looked around the room and spotted the toilet, so I said, "I you, toilet!"

The parent staff did not say "Aww", this time. They said that I was being silly, and that I should not love toilets as much as I love mummy and daddy. So I laughed and said it lots more times.

I think that the parent staff were laughing too - but sneakily, because they did not want me to know how funny I am.

I gave mummy an extra big kiss at bedtime, because it is her birthday. Now that I am in bed, I suspect that the parent staff will be getting up to mischief with their friends and playing silly grown-up games ... but this is okay, as long as they keep the noise down and do not disturb my sleep.

Tuesday, 1 January 2013

The parent staff had friends at our house today. The friends must have arrived here last night, while I was in bed asleep.

The parent staff often have friends round to play in the night time when they have put me to bed, out of the way. This is because when I am up and visitors are here, the visitors are more interested in me than the parent staff, because I am much more fun. For this reason the parent staff have their play times in the night instead of the day, so that I do not steal their thunder.

I'm not sure exactly what the parent staff and their friends were up to last night, but when they had finished being rowdy, mummy and daddy came to sleep in the big sofa-bed in my room, because there was no room for them anywhere else in the house. Then daddy woke me up with his massive pig snores, and after that I could not go back to sleep and I rolled around in my cot, kicking my legs and talking and occasionally making cross noises.

Mummy was not happy about this because it meant that me and daddy were both keeping her awake, and she was very tired in the morning. Daddy went out to work all day long and the visitors did not get up for quite a long time, so me and mummy crept around the house eating breakfast and getting dressed, and playing with our toys.

When the visitors got up it was lots of fun, because I had four extra grown-ups to play with. I had lots of books read to me and I served many cups of tea using my new purple tea set. I make really yummy invisible tea, and the grown-ups are always happy when I bring some to them.

After my morning of playing, I ate lunch and then mummy put me back into my cot for a nap. She has done this on a few afternoons recently, and at first I was not sure whether I should be cross about it ... but actually my nap time can be quite nice, and I find that I am usually happier in the afternoon if I have napped in my cot after lunch.

Mummy came to get me up from nap time after the visitors had gone home, and we spent the afternoon playing and taking my doll for a walk in her new pram. It was a nice afternoon.

Daddy was not back from work in time for my bedtime, but mummy says that he will be here when I get up tomorrow. I should get a good sleep tonight since the parent staff will be back in their own room, and daddy can share his pig snores with mummy and keep them away from me!